(I wrote this post last week but hit draft instead of post so I'm jumping into this month with it anyway. It's my blog, my rules. Tough nuggie)
My children are very patient with me, but that doesn't mean I get to draw the as much as I want So when they are looking particularly fetching, I try to take pictures. One of the things I had to come to terms with to start sketching, was that my hands have a permanent wobble. Not huge, but it amplifies the more controlled I try to be. Stepping back I've decided this is one of those hit you over the head life lessons - I am not in control of many of the details of my life, and by letting go of that illusion I've allowed myself to be open to many other experiences. Like drawing. (and other actually more profound ones but hey, this is my arty blog). I would love to draw like Nina Johnanson - so elegant.
Ain't going to happen.
But in reading her blog , she oohed and aahed about another urban sketcher who's freedom and energy she like. And sure enough, when I looked at her blog (which is in Spanish but many many illustrations) hers is a stye that I can ... aspire to? Recognize? Relate to. Obviously way above my pay grade, but still, a model of a possibility.
Ao although I am very critical of what I do, it is the "inner critic". I feel like the critic I hear is bumper lanes, letting me see which direction I actually want to be going in without too much pain. My children's portraits still don't look like them They eyes are too spread apart, too close, the nose is too long, the lips.... oh welll, the lips. Faces are so unforgiving - that's the way the human brain works to identify small small nuances of difference. BUT IT DOES"T MATTER! Each time I draw them, I see the nuances with hungry new eyes. They are a wonder and a delight to me. I get to revel in their awesomeness (yup, Po). I am filled with joy. Even as I recognize that I have done it off again.
I'll get there. I know I will. Because I'm there already. The day I step back and say -yup that's him/her will be the icing. But I am face planted in the cake.
I'm going to give this one a couple more tries, because he's so much fun to look at.
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